


Relief for a Weary Soul

by baberainbow



Category: Captain America (Comics), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Established Relationship, M/M, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Steve Helps The Soldier Ready for Bed after a long mission, but very little of it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-04
Updated: 2019-05-04
Packaged: 2020-02-25 22:56:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18711367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baberainbow/pseuds/baberainbow
Summary: The Soldier comes back from a mission, and his Heart takes care of him.





	Relief for a Weary Soul

**Author's Note:**

> This is post:Winter Solider in a canon divergent setting where Steve and Bucky are in an established relationship, living at the Tower, and Bucky is going on missions with Natasha. While there aren't any warnings, I have described the summary in the End Notes in case you want to make sure it is appropriate before you read. Everything depicted is consensual and loving.

The Widow finds him crushing the windpipe of a masked enemy operative. The Operative already had two bullets that the Soldier put into his gut, but the Operative provoked the Soldier even further. Smashing his airway is an adequate reactive measure to the Operative's aggressive offense. 

“That’s a bit excessive,” the Widow remarks. 

The Soldier drops the Operative into a boneless heap to the ground. He stares at her. She stares back. 

She looks away first to shoot another moving Operative that attempted to cross her. “Our pick up will be here in t-minus five. A clean up team is on the way. We need to leave.” 

The Soldier follows her out of the room, gun raised and eyes scanning. She leads him to the roof of the building, and he makes sure no one dares follow. She trains her gun at the door they just left before she attaches her Bites to the door. She throws a piece of rubble through it; the rubble is electrocuted. The Widow joins the Soldier. 

He does not know or remember why or what he is doing with the Widow, but he will protect her at all costs. 

“How about that for some quality time together?” she says. "These thumb drives will come in handy." 

The Soldier does not respond. 

“James?” she says. “James?” 

The Soldier does not respond. 

The Widow stands in front of him and inspects him. She tsks. 

“Well,” the Widow says quietly. “I'm speaking to the Soldier, aren't I? Something set you off, huh?” 

The Widow is smart. The Soldier is not sure what she means, but she must be right. 

“I'm sorry, James. Look. Once we’re on the jet, the mission’s complete. You can rest. Well done, Soldier.” 

The Soldier nods. 

The quinjet arrives forty-two seconds later than the Widow promised. She seems to pay no mind to her blatant error. 

She straps herself into a seat across from him. The Soldier does not bother strapping in. The quinjet lifts off. 

The Widow keeps looking in the Soldier's direction even though the Soldier does not provoke any attention. 

She clears her throat. “I’m sure Steve will be glad to see you. It’s been what, eight days?”

The Soldier looks at her. _Steve._

She smiles at him. “Thought that’d get your attention. I’m sure you’ll be glad to see him, too.” 

"I want Steve," he tells the Widow. "Take me to Steve." 

The Widow nods. "I will. We are on the way now." 

The Soldier may not remember why is he is being commissioned. He cannot recall when he started this mission with the Widow. But he knows the name "Steve," and he loves the person attached to that name. 

"We'll be back at the Tower soon," the Widow tells him. "Rest, Soldier." 

The Soldier obeys. He stops thinking. 

Then, the Widow snaps her fingers. He is thinking again and looks her way. 

The Widow speaks into her communication device. “Yeah, now he’s looking at me. He’s still coming down; he’d been staring at nothing for the past two hours.” The Widow pauses. “No, it’s still on. I’m not gonna try to pull it off his face. C'mon, now.” 

The Soldier hears her speaking but does not absorb Widow’s words. They are not orders or vital intel. His mission is over. The Soldier may rest. The Widow said so herself. 

“No, I’m not sure what caused it. He wasn’t like this before we breached the building.” She pauses. “We got separated right after the infiltration. Someone might have tried to trigger him or set him off." She pauses. "I don’t know. Honestly, I don't think he needs evaluation. He has not been violent with me. Very docile, in fact. I think he’s just in some head space. It happens. I used to do it, too. Ask Barton." She pauses again. "Fine." 

The Widow unstraps herself and stands before the Soldier. 

"Soldier," she tells him. She hands the communication device to the Soldier. "Steve would like to talk to you." 

The Soldier wants to talk to Steve. He loves Steve. Steve is his Heart. 

The Soldier takes the phone. The voice on the other side is warm. "Hey, Buck. This is Steve. Do you know who I am?" 

"Yes," the Soldier replies. 

"Do you feel okay?" his Heart asks. "I hear you're not feeling like yourself." 

"I am functioning," he responds. 

"Okay, buddy. I'm so happy you're coming home. Can you hand the phone back to the Black Widow?" 

He obeys his Heart. 

The Widow takes the phone and goes back to her seat. "See?" the Widow asks, strapping back in. She sighs heavily. "Cap, we've been operating in a very demanding and stressful environment for a week. It's possible he reverted back as a coping mechanism. Or something. Look, I'm not saying this is a good thing, but it could be way worse. If he’s not himself by morning, then I’d be worried. Let him realign himself. I'm sure being around you will let his guard down and make him feel safe. The fact he recognizes you is a very good sign." 

The Widow pauses. She barks something to the pilot. The pilot yells back. 

“We’ll be landing in twenty. Make sure you're on the roof. He told me earlier that he wants you," The Widow says. "And, try to follow the typical bedtime routine you guys do, okay? Make him feel normal. Let him settle back in." She sighs. "Alright, see you." 

The Widow sets her phone on her lap. She clears her throat. “Soldier.” 

The Soldier looks at her. 

“We’ll be landing soon. Steve’s gonna be there to greet us.” 

_Steve. His Heart._

"You really missed him, huh?" she says quietly. The Soldier is not sure if she requires a response, and he does not give her one. 

The Soldier stops thinking for a little while until the quinjet lands. The Widow unstraps herself and presses the doors open. 

"Well lookie here, Soldier. Steve's waiting for you just outside," she says. 

The Soldier exits the quinjet. 

When the Soldier sees Steve, _his Heart_ , a warm wave of calm washes over him. His Heart is a blonde, strong, and handsome. His Heart looks like he’s just woken up before walking up to the roof. His Heart wears plaid pants and has a coat on. His Heart is the best thing. The Soldier loves his Heart fiercely and solemnly. 

His Heart walks to him. “Hey, Buck.” His Heart stands close enough to place a gentle hand on his shoulder. The Soldier relishes in his touch. “Let’s go get ready for bed, huh? You must be tired.” 

The Soldier would do whatever his Heart wanted. 

The Widow joins them as they leave the roof. 

“We’ll be debriefing at Ten Hundred,” she says. She’s smiling. "Nice pajamas." 

His Heart blushes and scrunches his nose. “Thanks, Nat.” 

They walk into an elevator. The Widow presses a button, and His Heart presses a button. 

The Soldier stands close to his Heart. The Widow grins at his Heart. 

“Not a word, Nat,” his Heart says. 

The Widow winks as the elevator door opens, and she walks out. “Good night.” 

The Soldier watches his Heart blush as the elevator keeps going down. Then the doors open again. 

His Heart steers him out of the elevator. He is at his home. He knows these walls, the furniture, the space. This is his territory. This is where he and His Heart live. 

“Let’s go to bed,” his Heart says. His Heart takes off his coat. His shirt matches his bottoms: a red and blue plaid button-down flannel. The Soldier follows him into a bedroom. 

Their bedroom. 

The left side of the bed is rumpled, and the other side is still made. His Heart sits him on the bed and then walks over to a dresser. He opens a drawer and pulls out clothing. Then, he walks back over to the Soldier and sits beside him. 

“You hurting anywhere too bad?” he asks. 

The Soldier assesses his body. He shakes his head. "Negative." 

“Okay. Let’s get you outta this outfit.” 

His Heart undresses the Soldier piece by piece. He unstraps his Kevlar and the clothing underneath. The Soldier is dirty. His Heart peels off his combat pants after tugging off his boots. His Heart disrobes the Soldier’s worn undergarments. 

Then, his Heart reaches for His Mask. The Soldier stops him by grabbing his wrist. The Soldier does not wish him harm, though. His Mask keeps him safe. 

His Heart is soft, still. “You sure you want it on? It’s not comfortable to sleep in.” 

The Soldier is not convinced. 

His Heart sighs softly and pouts his lip out. “How am I gonna get a kiss goodnight if you’re wearing a mask, huh? You don’t wanna give me one?” 

The Soldier does wants to kiss him goodnight. He takes off His Mask. Surely, his Heart will keep him safer anyways. 

His Heart smiles at him. 

His Heart stands and takes the dirty clothing in his arms. “C’mon, let’s go get you in the shower.” 

The Soldier follows him into their bathroom. His Heart takes the pile of clothing and puts them into a hamper. The Soldier’s feet are cold against the tile. The air vent is loud.

His Heart slides open the shower door and adjusts the temperature of the now running water. He holds his palm underneath the spray. “It’s still warming up. Come brush your teeth.” 

The Soldier walks to the right side of the sink. He does not know why, but he knows that this is his side. 

His Heart watches him as he dabs toothpaste onto a wetted brush and begins to clean his teeth. The Soldier hadn’t realized how his mouth had tasted of copper until the mint touched his tongue. 

After one minute, he spits out. His Heart opens the shower door. It has steam on its side. 

“Go wash up. I’ll go put some towels in the dryer to warm up for you.” 

The Soldier stares at his Heart. 

His Heart laughs. “No, I’m not gonna get in with you, Buck. But I’ll be right back, I promise.” 

The Soldier enters the shower. He moans when the water hits his back. That is not a sign of weakness; he is at home with his Heart so the Soldier can indulge in moments of comfort. It is acceptable. 

There are many soaps and toiletries. He grabs one that smells like his Heart and rubs it over himself. His body is dirty and sweaty. He watches the filthy, rust-colored water spin against the drain. 

His Heart returns to the bathroom with some towels. He wants to see his Heart better, so he wipes away the steam obstructing his view. 

"Hey," his Heart smiles at the Soldier and whistles. “You’re looking good, Buck. Don’t forget your hair.” 

There’s blood in his hair. The Soldier does not know if it is his or not. He sees a bottle that he recognizes as shampoo and pours it directly on top of his scalp. He runs his fingers through it until the white foam is all over his hair. 

For a moment, he feels the phantom touch of his Heart carding his fingers through the suds of his hair. Holding him under the warm spray. The tiles of shower under his knees, his mouth full of his Heart's cock. His Heart kissing his neck and the knobs of his spine. 

The image makes the Soldier's face warm, and blood pools low in his groin. 

Then, the soap begins to run over his face, so he closes his eyes before they sting. He rinses the remains of the suds from his hair. 

He turns off the shower. 

His Heart hands him a towel and helps him dry off. “Isn’t that much better?” 

Yes, The Soldier thinks. 

His Heart rubs the Soldier’s hair with a towel. "Here," he says, and he gives the Soldier a brush. The Soldier combs his wet hair, and his Heart fluffs at it again with the towel. Then he ties it back with an elastic hair band. "Aren't you handsome?" his Heart asks. 

The Soldier does not know the answer to that. "You are," he tells his Heart instead. 

His Heart blushes then tugs the Soldier's hand. "Alright, champ. Let's get ready for bed.” 

He follows his Heart back into the bedroom. His Heart gives him the new clothing to change into. 

His boxers are plaid and clean. His pajamas pants are soft flannels, just like his Heart’s but black and green. He is given a white t-shirt that is loose fitting. 

His Heart turns off the lights and fan in the bathroom. Only the lamp on the nightstand emits the light for the room. 

The Soldier notices a glass of water that had not been there before is now on the right side nightstand. His Heart must have gotten it for him. The right side of the bed has been undressed as well, only a pillow remains and a thrown back quilt. 

His Heart climbs into his side of the bed and yawns. "Come to bed, Buck," his Heart insists, patting the side of the bed next to him. 

The Soldier hesitates. He must make sure his Heart is safe. He needs to do a perimeter check. The Soldier heads to the bedroom door, and then his Heart says, "Don't worry, honey. I put on the alarm. All the doors are locked. The Tower is safe. We're safe." 

The Soldier trusts this Heart. He comes to the bed. The Soldier peels back the quilt and sheet back and climbs in too. He did not register how tired his feet were until they touched the cool spots at the end of the mattress. His Heart comes next to him and touches his face gently. 

He hands the Soldier a tube of lip balm. "You usually put some on before bed," his Heart explains. The Soldier flicks off the cap and applies the balm to his lips. It tastes like mint and tingles. The Soldier puts the cap back on and hands it back to his Heart. He smiles. 

"I'm so glad you're back, honey," his Heart tells him. 

The Soldier agrees. He is pleased to be back in his bed with his Heart. "Yes," he says. 

"I missed you," his Heart says. 

The Soldier missed his Heart. He aches for him, and it must be obvious. 

“Do you still want to give me a kiss goodnight?” his Heart asks, softly. 

The Soldier nods. 

“I’d like one,” his Heart says. “You can give me one if you want.” 

The Soldier touches his Heart on the face and props his Heart’s chin up. He kisses his Heart briefly. It is good. Delicate and sweet. The Soldier wants to give him a longer one, with an open mouth. Yet, his Heart wants one kiss, and the Soldier is tired. He pulls away. 

“That was real nice, Buck,” his Heart tells him. “I know you’re a little foggy. But just know, I'll always be here for you. Thank you for letting me take care of you tonight.” 

The Soldier looks at his Heart. His beautiful Heart. 

“I love you,” the Soldier says. His voice is quiet. 

His Heart smiles at him. "I love you too, Buck." 

The Soldier likes hearing that.

“Can I have one more kiss?” his Heart asks, so sweetly . 

The Soldier gives him another. When he pulls away, his face is warm. His Heart's thumb swipes up and down on his cheek, and his eyes are crinkled. 

His Heart smiles and yawns. “Let's go to sleep. I’m sure you’ll be feeling more like yourself in the morning.” 

The Soldier nods. 

"I'll make you breakfast before you go debrief with Natasha tomorrow, okay?" his Heart adds. 

The Soldier understands. "Yes," he affirms. 

His Heart crawls back over into his side of the bed and reaches to turn off the side lamp. The room is dark, but there is some light peeking through the curtains. His Heart positions himself on his side facing the Soldier. The Soldier follows his lead and rests his head against the pillow.

The Soldier reaches out for his Heart’s hand and holds it.

He falls asleep, satisfied that he and his Heart are safe and warm in bed with the lingering touch of a kiss on their lips.

**Author's Note:**

> Quick Summary: Bucky reverts to the Soldier at the end of a long mission with Natasha. He is acting violent towards operatives that are enemies. Natasha recognizes Bucky is the the Soldier and alerts Steve. The Soldier however is not acting violently towards Natasha, and he recognizes the name Steve. Even as the Soldier, he loves Steve and calls him His Heart. When home, Steve helps him strip for the shower but does not join him. In the shower, the Soldier remembers some intimate moments Bucky and Steve have had in the shower. Steve helps him brush his teeth, and when they are in bed, they share a consensual kiss.


End file.
